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If you had done more Sports​.​.​. (Wheelchair Suicide according to Charles Bukowski)

from Hemlock Smith & les Poissons Autistes: "Three Times Dead" by Hemlock Smith

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If you had done more sports. (Wheelchair Suicide according to Charles Bukowski)

Here I am, sitting in my top-notch, guaranteed-for-life wheelchair, a crouched and pathetic figure on the first floor of my completely Hollywood mansion, staring down the spiral staircase, the stairway to nothingness and oblivion.
Images keep flickering in my head : Gene Tierney throwing herself down the stairs because she didn't want her baby, Richard Widmark pushing the old lady down to her demise in « Kiss of Death ». I remember the old woman having a chair with really big wheels – kinda cool !! And I can still hear Richard's crazed laughter when he dit it, even though I haven't seen the film since 1951. He was a swell guy, Richard ; I met him once, but the sound of his name was a little bit too german for me !
Such great movies ! Come to think of it, my life has never been this dramatic. Quite the opposite, really. The stroke was just bad luck, the doctor had said, and of course, the alcohol and the cigarettes didn't help !
« If you had done more sports … » he had whispered, regretfully, avoiding my eyes.
« Well, then, time for my exercise… », I mutter and unlock the brakes. I roll towards the staircase and try to convince myself that I'm actually gonna do it !
« It's time for my close-up, Mr. De Mille !! », I shout as my wrists tighten desperately around the wheels.
But then, all this seems so ridiculous, pretentious and vain ! Real torture in a wheelchair is not to end it, but to sit it out and wait, wait for Cpt. Death to finally find you, helpless, sweating and full of piss !
I roll back to my bedroom and turn on the TV.
« What was I thinking ? » I mumble, as I pour myself an indecently large glass of scotch. I lean back into my comfy, wheeled prison and grab the remote control :
« Well then, let's find ourselves some sports !...we can do porn later ! »

(and the wheel of fate, turns round and round…
Wheelchair of fate, turns round and round and round…)

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from Hemlock Smith & les Poissons Autistes: "Three Times Dead", released December 5, 2008

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Hemlock Smith Lausanne, Switzerland

Hemlock Smith come from Lausanne (Switzerland). Since 2002, they’ve released 7 regular albums with intelligent pop, as well as 2 soundtracks for silent film and 2 collaborations with Noise duo Les Poissons Autistes. Fronted by singer-songwriter Michael Frei, Hemlock Smith's distinctive voice is complemented by a talented band seamlessly blending Pop, Folk, Rock and Trip-Hop Sensibilities ... more

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